Even in a perfect world people would be assholes. Growing up in a home with two happily married parents, I never really thought that people cheated on each other – yes, I was young and naïve, but I’d never actually seen it in the real world.
Then I got older.
I’ve seen married men with kids cheating on their wives and I’ve had friends who’ve been cheated on by their loser boyfriends. Shit, I’ve had piece of shit friends who cheated on their boyfriends. But in none of those instances has anyone gotten caught, oddly enough. Maybe I gravitate towards being friends with sneaky people, but it helps that none of my friends are as pathetically stupid as Zoe.
Zoe, you see, not only cheated on her boyfriend, Jordan, but then accidentally sent him a text talking about how she’s been going around behind his back and seeing another guy. Why’d she send him that text? Well, it was meant for a friend, but like I said: Zoe is a few cards short of a deck.
Jordan, as I’m sure you’ve already guessed, was not amused. Rather than go the typical route when you find out you’ve been cheated on, i.e. sad-eat an entire Chinese buffet and then tell LITERALLY EVERYONE IN THE WORLD what a piece of shit your now-ex is, Jordan went and cut out the General Tso’s and skipped right to step two:
Not gonna lie, that’s one hell of a way to win a breakup — Jordan’s original tweet with the screenshot of Zoe’s text currently has 57,000 re-tweets and 255,000 favorites.
The Internet has spoken…
…Zoe girl, you done fucked up.